who is this other me who gets disturbed at grand central station,by seeing old woman asking for help and does nothing . I kept walking but other manish was stuck there looking for answer which life brings in front of him....she was old fragile and her hands were shaking ...she was asking directions standing in front of entrance of grand central station which is located on the side of chryslar building ..she stood there and manish moved on . Oh this instance is not over yet , one lady gave her a hand and the quilt of manish reach to intense where manish felt like a looser since he lost the opportunity to be a good man ... Mind of manish moved on .... But something broke inside manish and these words are efforts to build that broken piece and this broken world still lingers on ......
There is another manish who has this taste for great art and music, this greatness of music and art in mind mostly shaped by readings and my own ambition to become elite in life. My idea of elite was shaped by media and other s opinions. Udharu aadmi hoon main!!!,
after few days .... was sitting in starbucks located near city hall .it was quite cold. People keep their ac so cold in this country. Its so strange in summer their ac will be cold and winter you can sweat inside the building .... Bought some roasted almond,oatmeal cookie and venti java chip frappuccino . This food has hell lot of calories . Started reading borges again.
i find him very diverse and philospical his prose are combination of someone who is very scholerly and original. Scholalarly in the sense that he quotes lot of greek and western philosphers in his writing ,sometimes his stories are so interpersed with historical dates,quotes and real character that its difficult to predict if his is just creating fictional settings with original quotes and dates.
One has to understand the world of blindness to understand borges . I am not talking about blindness which is dark or in other words black and white. His blind world is rich as james joyce,homer ,milton and surdas. In that world there are all colors except black ....
while reading him body felt cold and ,manish thought tagore's story of moonlight when reader is reading the beauty of moon while sitting inside the house and when he sees the moon through his window .... He leaves the book and see the words were just indicator of that vast and serene beauty which night was expanding all over ....
So manish came outside and sit in the park .some smell of dead animals are in the air ,sound of cars and other motors,laughter of friends and that artificial water fall ....
this smell of outside is better than the starbucks .. Its earthy and engaging its own ugliness and beauty....music on satellite radio is great in the starbucks store ,its clean and lively but this park inspires manish to reach some higher forms of consciousness which is jointly shared by trees,mosquitos and crickets ,squirrels around me .... ..
The truth is that there are many Manish whose existent I am not aware of ...........Still searching there .......
2 comments:
What is the definition of a 'good man', anyway? And what is higher form of consciousness? Why is it not possible to attain that "higher form of consciousness" in Starbucks?
Defining good man would be futile attempt to capture the essence of that term, One should understand the duality of language and limitations of words, Its easy to become prisoner of language and then keep dissecting the terms and definitions.
Having said this and setting up pretext and assumptions ..........my idea of good man is quite vague in present times since later years in my life I have started questing the many definitions and concepts which I considered dear to my heart. Lots of elements of good man still comes from my up bringing in small village and the kindness of heart which make all fellow human being unique and inspire us to respect each other. Let me get closer to the term itself , to make it simpler for the understanding of mind I must borrow the term from Buddha “ Karuna”(compassion is close but still unable to grasp the wholeness of this state , in nut shell, I think karunasheel man is my man , a person who shares the whole world with self not as a moral duty but as result of his higher level of consciousness. For me one such man was Ramakrishna Paramhansa .
About higher from of consciousness........ You seem to be chasing all those terms about which you already have some fixed ideas. Lets remove the term higher here and just be focus on consciousness itself. For me consciousness has direct relation with karuna and capacity to feel the connection with all living beings. For example one sees the majesty of trees and feel mighty , one sees the beauty of rose and something flowers in his heart , these are just few example which is the experience of narrator......
I think Starbucks has better opportunity to reach there if one can develop the sense of watcher and has the ability to distinct the act,action and actor.
There is certain usefulness in repetitious activity . When the hero of Marquez's Novel one hundred of years of solitude Colonel Aurelio Buendía make little Gold fishes in old age and I also realized then why Kabir was just enjoyed being a Julaha or why Gandhi enjoyed spinning Charkha wheel so much or why Kalidasa repeated Mara mara mara and get connected to Ram ..............May I write about this whole phenomena later , Which would build the relationship between Kafka'sGregor Samsa ( Metamorphosis ) sense of death and inaction with the repetitious act of our life. How one can use the transformation of self while performing the act itself
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